Preventing Stress

 

How can I possibly take care of my personal worry or stress?

Interestingly we know what to do when we fall sick, feel hungry, or even get cold.

We go into the kitchen and look out for food in the fridge or better still go grab a snack. When we are super hungry, we can even go as far as asking a neighbor for food when we have little or non to eat.

When we feel sick, a friend of mine who is a medical practitioner said to start with paracetamol. The fact remains that we know what to do when we feel sick, we visit a medical center or a drug store.

When we get cold, we find a safe way of getting warmed up. When we feel like we have added weight, we simply go to the gym.

We know what to do at every point of our life but we hardly know what to do when we have personal worries.  When we have failed in certain areas or have records of disappointments either in business, relationship, marriage, studies, or even in life as a whole.

The worse of it all is to judge yourself. When you have bad breath, you still have you for yourself, when everyone doesn’t feel comfortable around you because of your breath, you are still there for you. You cannot possibly start rejecting the free gift of self-worth given for free by the Highest authority.

When we read some funny, scary but very inspiring stories from the Christian holy book or book of Law (The Bible), like the story of Abraham, walking majestically to kill his only Son for a sacrifice to a God in his head, whom he believes had given the child to him, you think he had no foundation? No decision to have started to believe whatever he believed in that led him to that Hight of faith in his own God, you think he didn’t have a destination? Abraham had no plans. If he had any plans of his own, he wouldn’t listen to such a very crazy and barbaric instruction to have his only son of more than 100 years killed for a sacrifice. Not for wealth, not for fame, not for anything else but a mark of loyalty.  I bet he didn’t tell his wife before he took her son on that God-forsaken trip. Because the character that we know his wife to be, wouldn’t have submitted to such a crazy Idea.

But why?

Loyalty to the authority that has given him life and prosperity as he believed.   (To be continued.)

How can you handle your personal worry?

Personal worry is a slow killer. When you are worried about anything, it affects every part of your life. You even find it very difficult to get attracted to life’s attractions including being attracted to your spouse, or your favorite movies, food, and many others.

It is amazing how easy it could be to start getting your worries away from you. Try following these steps below:

Talk to somebody:

Some time ago, in June 2018 when I lost a close family member, my biggest Sister, very loving, caring, and always ready to listen and lend a hand even at midnight.

I was at work and had to represent a client for a Schengen visa at 1pm the same day. When I got called, you wouldn’t imagine what went through my mind at that moment, I was heavy inside of me, couldn’t speak to anyone apart from the General manager, but that wasn’t enough because surely, he is on a hot seat and wouldn’t understand what this young man is talking about.

It was getting closer to the time for my interview, I had no option, if I must take a break, I have to finish the day's appointment. So I headed to the train, so heavy and difficult to let out the tears. At some point, something told me to talk to someone man:  then I turned around to a man who identified later as Pandey from India, and I told him thus, hey man, I lost a family member today, oh really, He exclaimed:  and then there was this Filipino also on the train who echoed from behind me, oh so sorry, I had felt the same way when I lost my mom last year, and she couldn’t hold her tears, that was when I had the opportunity to cry tears also and we all ended up at the same station, I think they had to stop there to comfort me further, we exchanged numbers and are friends to date.

The fact is, I heard from them, strange people, we cried together, they encouraged me to stay strong, to sing along if I could sing, or think about how lovely it would be to meet her again someday as most religion believes. So, one of the fastest remedies would be to just simply talk to someone, anyone close to you at that moment could do the magic.  

Talk to a close friend:

Some folks feel very comfortable talking to close friends. Some want to keep every personal problem as private as they can which isn’t a bad idea. If this works for you, don’t wait for the right time because there has never been a right time for anything. The time to talk to him/her is now, at the moment you have that bad feeling, at the moment you find it so difficult to cry those tears, it’s the time to talk to a friend of yours, do not do it because he or she has a solution to your problem, nobody has any solution to any others’ problems, only talking about your problem is a big solution for you and your troubled soul. Cry if it calls for tears, laugh if it calls for a loud one, talk and talk if it calls for so much talking, talk until you are tired of talking and need to rest. Keep worried out of your soul as much as you can.

Talk to your Partner:

We all know that in every relationship, there are slight issues from time to time, but one of the worse issues is not being able to talk about what might be troubling you either personally or a troubling habit in your relationship. It is very important to talk with your partner. It should become a habit to talk to your partner at all times as talking would bring about understanding. You can’t possibly understand what you haven’t even heard or talked about.

Talk to A therapist:

They are very important today and always. If you are so worried and do not know how to go about things around you, talk to a therapist. They are not available to cure madness, No. I told a lady to go visit a therapist for a chat and she got so furious with me because she felt like I was indirectly telling her husband that she has a mental problem. No. sometimes you need to speak to a therapist. Infect, everyone should have a therapist that YOU SPEAK TO FROM TIME TO TIME, LIKE A FAMILY THERAPIST. They know exactly how to handle stress, and can help you handle that stress.

Be Open

Truthfully being open about your struggle can help even others who might be on the same page with you. People who are on the same struggle, and then solutions would begin to pop up. If you keep your worry to yourself, the solutions would never come, because what you couldn’t handle will remain with you. You can only postpone the consequences, whatever you ignore today, will still wait for you to handle, opening up to someone would mean your stress is almost over. Just remember that talking to people can help others also.

All of these ideas have the same thing in common which is expressing your emotions at a given time, they aren’t to find solutions to them. Finding the solution is really awesome, but only talking about your worry is sure a great solution to whatever it is.

Summary:

Research from U.C.L.A. suggests that putting your feelings into words — a process called “affect labeling” — can diminish the response of the amygdala when you encounter things that are upsetting. This is how, over time, you can become less stressed over something that bothers you. For example, if you got in a car accident, even being in a car immediately afterward could overwhelm you emotionally. But as you talk through your experience, put your feelings into words, and process what happened, you can get back in the car without having the same emotional reaction.

While talking is important, remember to choose the right people to talk to, and as much as possible even though there is no very right time, choose the right time.  

Talk about the good and the bad not only the bad experiences are worth talking about, and give yourself a break, know when it's done, and let yourself know it’s done.